I lost my voice

I sit at @carolienkarsten her dinner table with 6 other businesswomen. As part of her launchschool program I share where I currently stand in establishing my new business. “I know exactly what I have to do. I have to write, write, write, but I can’t get anything on paper.”

I tell them that I have been writing all my life, first through diaries, then a blog and later on Facebook. I shared everything about my life, the ups and downs, writing was my outlet, but also what allowed me to connect with my followers.

I hear myself say, “I lost my voice 3.5 years ago when I left my ex and he told me not to talk to anyone about us being apart. This is when I stopt writing”. I burst into tears. Wow, that one hits home. I can feel the impact in my whole being. I share that this was reinforced by a spiritual coach who said I was “too present” during her retreat and told me that silence was my strength. Both felt like trauma, but were a mirror to an old childhood piece where there was no place for my voice, what I saw and knew and where I learned to make myself small so the other would feel better.

Over the past 4.5 years I have changed so much, that now I am about to launch something really big into the world, I almost don’t know where to start. My Insta stories are usually all over the place and only represent 1% of what is going on inside me and what I would like to share.

After 2 months of suffering from my sinuses and throat, ads about voice liberation constantly coming my way and having certain dreams, I am finally listening to all the signals my body, inner child and soul are signaling to me. This week I liberated my voice and felt space in my throat chakra, which was not there for a very long time.

I am ready to come out of my 4,5 year of hibernation. It is time to stop hiding and playing small. There are so many stories in my head that I want to share that I’ll just start with this one and see what comes next.

Corinnexxx